


Special Delivery

by Inkribbon796



Series: Egotober 2019 [28]
Category: Jacksepticeye Fandom, Markiplier fandom - Fandom, Nathan Sharp Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Birthday, Disagreements on what constitutes as candy, Egotober 2019, M/M, background Darkstache, candy theft, no consequence stabbing, superhero au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2021-01-05 17:24:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21212318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inkribbon796/pseuds/Inkribbon796
Summary: It’s Natemare’s birthday, and all he really wants is a little bit of chaos. Good thing Wilford is here to supply it.





	Special Delivery

Natemare shook a large box wrapped in black and orange wrapped paper.

“Just open it, ye milk drinker,” Anti insulted, the glitch demon was chewing on the contents of a bag of chocolate caramel-filled turtles.

“I just wanna know if there’s a knife inside,” Natemare responded before ripping the top of the box open and dumping it out to reveals bags of skittles, bars of chocolate, gummies, and a pocket knife etched with music notes on the handle.

Natemare grabbed the knife and stabbed the closest candy bar, “Yes!”

“Do you think he liked it?” Wilford was suddenly standing next to Anti, the glitch demon flinched, clearly not expecting the mad reporter there. Wilford had a bag of black licorice in his hands.

“Shite! Wilf!” Anti cursed. “Dark needs ta put a bell on ye.”

“You like it?” Wilf asked, ignoring the bell comment.

“Thanks for the knife,” Natemare grinned. “You forgot my favorite, though.”

“I didn’t forget,” Wilford warned, “you’re just a cretin. No one actually likes that stuff, you’re just defiling perfectly good candy.”

“Spicy starbursts are the best,” Natemare has a rather feral grin on his face. “I like mixing them in with other people’s bags and watching them suffer, it’s good for a laugh.”

Wilford pointed his favorite knife, a stiletto, at the younger of the two glitch demons. “The only laugh we’ll be having is when I tickle you with my knife,” Wil threatened.

“You don’t have the spine, old man,” Natemare teased.

Wil, however, just stabbed him in the chest, which would have killed Natemare if Wilford wasn’t dealing with an aberration of sentient matter.

“Really?” Natemare rolled his eyes, “Great, now I have to get a new shirt.”

“You were the one making a fuss,” Wilford reminded, gesturing wildly with his knife, the bag of licorice on his hip, trapped by his other hand.

“What’yah doing with that?” Anti asked, pointing to the bag.

“Oh, this?” Wilford smiled, holding the bag up. “It’s for Yan. She and Dark love it. I can’t stand this stuff personally.”

“Americans,” Anti scoffed in disgust. “Just one bag? What lightweights.”

“Oh no, these are the leftovers, I got more but I figured I’d play a little bit of a joke with them first,” Wilford chuckled, snapping his fingers and an old fashion TV in a wooden shelf, with just a remote, appeared next to him.

Anti and Natemare just looked at it, mostly confused. The monitor didn’t appear to have anything attached to it but with a press of the button it turned on and the news appeared as clearly as if it were a 4K monitor.

_ _ _ “This just in,” _ the news woman on the screen commented, the headline on the screen had both the glitch demons roaring with laughter:  _ Candy Thief Strikes Again: City Hall Flooded with Candy. _

_ _ _ “An update on the recent theft of over 500lbs of licorice and dark chocolate from all over town, recently found in City Hall,” _ she continued, a quiver at the side of her mouth. That was all Anti needed to know that she found this as funny as they did.

Then it cut, and Anti was almost crying as Mayor Damien’s rather unamused, downright resigned, face on camera. Which Anti knew he was only finding it so funny because that was Dark and Wilford was about to get away with stuffing the entirely of City Hall with candy.

_ _ _ “I don’t think it takes a career detective to figure out who did this, now if you don’t mind, I have an office to clean,” _ Damien then proceeded to just walk away.

Wilford turned off the monitor, “I planned putting this one down too, but ran out of room in Dames’s wine cupboard and didn’t want to put it on the floor.”

“Why not?” Natemare grinned. “It’s  _ one bag _ .”

“Candy on the floor?” Wilford frowned. “It’s tacky and unprofessional. Not to mention a complete waste.”

The entire room got some of the color bled out as the TV sparked to life and then Dark’s typical face appeared on it, a bag of black licorice half hidden from frame.  _ “Wilford M. Warfstache! Why am I being blamed for this?” _

“Welp, they found the note, time for me to make myself scarce, gentlemen,” Wilford smiled. “Happy birthday my friend.”

“Yeah, thanks for the laugh,” Natemare chuckled, and Wilford and the TV were gone.


End file.
